It's been a while. I came back from Hawaii and transitioned into managing Pure Barre. I’ve been doing some soul searching trying to find myself stable and trying to find a good cry somewhere within. It seems easy, but I found myself sleeping all day on Sundays, shopping obsessively and eating way to much or not eating at all. I call this imbalance and I'm only myself when I am balanced and even though I knew I was off, I needed a couple weeks to get grounded again. Change, although exciting and desired, always takes a minute to get used to something new. Anyway, I'm here... alive... inspired... and embracing it "all."
Every day I learn something new about myself and NYC has made me realize how straight forward of a person I am. I don't think I knew this, or maybe I have become this. The people I have worked with in NYC pointed this out to me. I don't sugar coat anything and just say it... for what it is and that's that. Part of it is me just being open minded and part of it is just how I am. It doesn't make me a mean person, but it does make me an honest person. If I'm lying I can't keep a straight face and my pitch will, without a doubt, go up. Or I'll bust out laughing. Not that I lie. haha.
My job requires me to be a certain someone. In a lot of ways I use Beyonce's method of creating a character (her's being Sasha Feirce) when I teach my classes. I want to exude confidence, strength, peace and passion to my clients and I want to motivate them. In pure barre I am "to the point" and want to push my clients mentally and physically, I want them to go outside their head for 55 minutes and just be present. There is nothing more beautiful than that. I probably come off as drill sergeant. The co-owner referred to my classes as "no non-sense." Even my lulu managers used to say "Uh oh... Here comes Keni with her whips!!!" haha. Again, I promise I'm not mean. But it goes to show you that I don't take shit and I don't want anyone in my life to take shit either! lol I just want everything to be... (but I don't want Romney to be President!!). I went out the other night and was asking this door guy where something was, and the guy called me the devil because I didn't crack a smile or try to flirt. A fellow co-worker stepped in and got the information we needed, but it makes me laugh out loud when I think about my approach to things. Revamp? Ha.
I got a tweet one day from a PB client sending her two favorite instructors in the city a great article and I wanted to cry (well, the highest level of emotion I can reach right before crying). NYC has some of the most amazing instructors in the world and for me to impact someone, is literally a dream come true. It is exactly the reason I do what I do and want to do more. She read my blog and liked how she could relate to it (being a 20-something year-old female in the city too), she said a lot of other sweet things too and I just wanted to share how it's insane how one person can change your whole perspective. After reading her email, I felt something ignite again. I refer to this a lot, but it's an adrenaline rush and it's the exact feeling that has gotten me where I am today. Without the fire, I wouldn't be me.
A couple weeks ago, I went to Florida for Lori’s sisters wedding. Mandy came to visit a couple weeks before and we hung out in the city. She and Lori are the same person, but Mandy is the sweeter version. I had so much fun laughing with her and going out in the city. Lori had left me for three weeks to go to Florida, so Mandy and I really got some quality time in. She is a trooper. She dealt with me for a week of my non-sense (my cynicism in love and marriage, life and men) and we really bonded. Her wedding in Jacksonville, Fl was so fun and beautiful and I am so happy for her and her husband!
The city is currently preparing for “hurricane” Sandy. The grocery stores were riots filled with crazy moms and cautious adults preparing for the “worst.” That would have been me, two years ago. Instead, I bought some triscuits, tortellini and made taco soup today. I don’t like to get carried away with preparation any more. In reality, nothing can prepare you for what life throws sometimes, so it’s better I stay adaptable and easy going.
Halloween is this Wednesday and so the weekend was filled with lots of fun events. Lori and I dressed as the white and black swan (her being the white because her skin is paler?? And me being the black swan because my skin is darker (and I’m just darker of a person than her??)) lol. It was just how it was going to be, and I didn’t question the whys. I like black better any way. Needless to say my last three nights were insane!
I pulled a 19-year old move and got 3-hours of sleep on Thursday making my Friday a bit delirious. I taught the early PB class and worked all day. Lori came to the west side and we had lunch at Rosa Mexicano and bought tutu’s for our costumes. I celebrated my friend’s birthday Friday night and Lori hosted us a table with her new job. We left the club after spending 20 minutes in the bathroom trying to escape a stalker and Lori and I found ourselves seated in the patio area of a closed restaurant and when the conversation started getting dark and depressed, with the need to make needy phone calls, I said, “Let’s go home!”
Lori had made me take the subway home (it only took us an hour and half), but my feet were in so much pain, and I was walking so slow, Lori said it was a good thing she was with me because everyone kept looking at me like I was a prey! LoL (Had I been alone I would have taken a cab!)
Lori made me switch her shoes so I could move at a tortoise pace rather than a mangled snail. It was really sweet of her and she’s my best friend because she sacrificed for me! She was trying to be thrifty and refused to split the cab, and I had already paid for the cab downtown, so I just went along. We finally made it home and her friend was waiting for us at the apartment. They stayed up and I went to bed. I slept a lot of my Saturday away. Not because I partied too hard, but because I didn’t really have anything else to do and I was healing from my subway walk of death!
My third nap was the final straw and when I woke up at 6 p.m. I decided it was time I get my costume together. Hahaha. I did go to the store Saturday, clean a little, walked around some, thought about working out several times, so it wasn’t a total waste.
Lori got home from work and we got ready with her friend who was visiting. We had a lot of fun dancing and laughing Saturday in costume and character. The white and black swan was a hit and we developed a bit of a fan club. We went home after I was denied access into a bar because of my “sassy” behavior. LoL. It was my bedtime!!!
When we got uptown, I washed my face and went straight to bed. Lori’s friend, who was staying with us wanted food and because all I had was triscuits and uncooked pasta, I told them to call our Pizza place.
Lori and I have this pizza place a couple blocks away that we end up at a lot when we have a late night. We have made friends with Hassan, one of the guys, who loves us because we come in and cause a ruckus in this tiny pizza shop at random hours (day light ones included- in fact, we ate there before we went out!!!) Hassan had me believing he was a twin once and I talked smack about Hassan thinking it was Sam, his “twin,” but found out later there’s no twin and what really happened was I talked smack about Hassan to Hassan! Haha. He still loves us and they happened to be open when we got home. Lori made the call and said something like “Hassan, you’re going to deliver us the pizza and throw in some garlic knots for free!” hahaha. He delivered the pizza (with garlic knots) himself and hung out with us for a while. I was half way asleep and they stayed up talking about Morocco and career decisions. I passed out after he asked us to name the first university in the world (random 4 a.m. convo). This sounds so shady and irresponsible, and I promise it’s just how it sounds. He’s a really nice sweet guy, hard worker at this pizza place, whose married with five-kids, who is maybe pushing 30. That doesn’t help does it?
Anyway, eventful weekend as it was, I’m taking today and chilling out. I made taco soup this morning and cleaned the apartment. Lori went to work and I’ve been enjoying the quiet. Subways are closing, schools are cancelling, work may or may not be cancelled, but there’s only one way to get to work (cabs), so I don’t know. Everything, as usual, is up in the air. :)
Much love from the city. Xoxoxo.
This blog represents my thoughts and what's going on in the world through my eyes. It's personal, real, sad and funny and is an outlet and a way to share with you, my life and the adventures of this amazing city and beyond.
“Ask for what you want and be prepared